I took today off work to help get my shit together. Went over to Sara’s this morning and had a wonderful time, and didn’t have a single thought about Sammy until I got home early this afternoon. But somewhere between lying in bed this morning with the Committee and getting home, something inside had changed.<\/p>\n
I had somewhere without realising it found the motivation to begin to crawl up the hill again. So this afternoon I rang couple of Sammy’s friends, chatted and asked some hard questions. Then I rang work and took another day off. After that I wrote Sammy one of those letters you don’t really mean to send, but says what it has to say, while tears poured from my eyes, nearly drowning the keyboard. I put in 40 mins on the exercise bike and threw myself in the shower. Then I did a Rune Spread and after that walked halfway up my block with a chair, and sat down in the middle of the block and just did a breathe meditation with my eyes closed for 5 mins.<\/p>\n
I’ve been solid since then, and feel more like my old self. I’m still wounded, but I believe I’ve started to heal. I hope by taking an extra day off that I’ll have a fairly normal attitude to most things back at work and won’t be “off with the pixies” 99% of the time when I get back.<\/p>\n
Now all I have left will be the Service in a few days, but I think I’ll be as ready for that as I can ever be now. I think I may have realigned to the Cosmos again.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I took today off work to help get my shit together. Went over to Sara’s this morning and had a wonderful time, and didn’t have a single thought about Sammy until I got home early this afternoon. But somewhere between lying in bed this morning with the Committee and getting home, something inside had changed. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,3,22,8,13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-583","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dreams","category-general","category-health","category-philosophy","category-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/583","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=583"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/583\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":587,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/583\/revisions\/587"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=583"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=583"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/m0rg0th.andulain.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=583"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}