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    The Great Railways of Life…


    2016 - 01.11

    One of the Greatest things I value in friends is the willingness to be honest with you even when they know it’s not what you want to hear. They have your best interests at heart, and want to help you do your best, experience the best and be the best that you can be. Really what more can you ask from a friend other than come for the ride!

    I picture the Journey of Life like a Train Ride where you travel along and can enjoy the scenery along the way to your destination. You can also involve yourself with those around you generally (although not always) in a pleasant and enjoyable fashion. At various points there are Stations (interludes) where you can change your Journey, pick a different Train on a different track to a different destination. At Stations you can do that Randomly or in an Orderly fashion, but generally in safety. Of course you’re free to jump from the Train at any point along the journey, betweens stations, albeit this is not recommended, and extremely risky. I generally don’t ask my friends to join me in such adventures, I think these escapades are best left for solo “flight”. It’s not to say that you won’t survive such a tumble, but choosing your landing site and the speed of the train at which you decided to bail out is recommended.

    If you wish you can continue on the same train until the end of the track. Inevitably this means you either pick a different destination or you’re dead.

    Creating New Directions by taking Action…


    2015 - 12.28

    Well as the year closes, it’s clear that although I’ve made fantastic progress with rising above my Depression, there’s still work to be done. Work has been difficult to get back into consistently with a combination of physical and psychological hurdles to overcome. Hopefully the New Year gives me a fresh start there. The damage done by my previous work situation is still not completely recovered from and there’s still some residual difficulties. However I’m placing a few new goals, and working towards them.

    As part of moving forward, from both a Psychological & Emotional point of view I’ve also begun planning a photographic working holiday for later in the year which has provided a much needed boost to my overall emotional state. I’m going to visit the South Island of New Zealand for several weeks, and spend that time travelling in a hired van living out of it and photographing in a number places around the Southern Island. I decided that hiring a van and doing it in my own time with an allowance of 3 weeks is plenty of time to see all I want to see in the South Island. I’ve asked someone to accompany me, but I’m still waiting on an answer there, so at this stage it will be by myself as originally planned unless my offer is accepted.

    All the advice I’ve received over the last few years suggests that trying to do both islands at the same time in anything under a month or so is a waste because you can’t spend the time you want to anyway for more than a short time. My thoughts are that with a generous amount of time, I can choose to stop where & when I like and enjoy the island to the maximum while giving myself plenty of time to get the sort of shots I want to bring home. Hopefully some of those shots will also generate some further income for the business.

    Retrospective and Looking Forward…


    2015 - 11.14

    Well as it gets further & further away in time from being at my old workplace, I realise how lucky I was to make the choice to leave when I did. I’m also very lucky in that I have friends willing to help me get through the few months between leaving and getting well enough to go back to work. In speaking to someone from my old workplace today, they remarked “how chipper” I sounded, to which of course I had to answer the truth, “…well I wasn’t working at that place anymore”! Simple but true. Leaving was the final significant action I had to make to break the cycle and step out and regain my life. Now I’ve a new job, new vision, new life, and new found zest for life. I have dreams, and the capacity to work towards achieving them.

    This morning I managed one step closer, after selling my first print from my new Online Store. Certainly I’m not retiring on the proceeds, but it’s a step towards opening that door. So while I was getting the print done for sale, I was also getting a couple of others done that I’d wanted for myself. I’m very happy with the results for all of them.

    Outside of that, nothing much further to report.

    Late October…


    2015 - 10.25

    So it’s been just on three months since I resigned my last position gave myself some time to heal. Not that I was doing nothing, obviously I wasn’t as there were things to be done. Clearly you don’t recover from Depression by doing nothing, that’s exactly what Depression does to you!

    Anyway things have a definite positive shine to them these days, and I started work again last week. At this stage the position I have is four days a week. This leaves me three days to devote to myself and my photography. It’s been a good start, the team I’ve joined are young, friendly and have a sense of humour. The pace is not overwhelming, and there’s no mad changing of the ground rules 6 times in a day. Additionally I’m not likely to be sent off at the drop of a hat to the other end of the State, although admittedly that wasn’t happening too often the last couple of years. So in reality what I have at the moment is another job like I had without the madness. Morale is not fantastic, but it seems nowhere in the bottom echelons of IT has good morale anymore. Too much Bean Counting taking place.

    I confess to feeling quite tired by the end of Thursday, but I found myself feeling quite refreshed after a morning shoot at a derelict Dairy with a friend on Friday morning. The trip to the Grampians didn’t eventuate this weekend, but that’s fine, there’s plenty of other opportunities for that option. It’s a blustery day today, warm as well. Good washing day! So now to finish washing and get it hung out.

    Not Exactly the Yellow Brick Road…


    2015 - 09.24

    Well it’s been another week passed and still I seem to be holding my own. I’ve had a couple of “flat” days, but nothing like the Depression I had been feeling just over two months ago. In general things seem to be back on track. Hopefully work is going to sort itself out over the next couple of weeks. I’m hopeful that I won’t need to pull full-time hours to get back into the “Black” at this stage but plan on going at it for up to twelve months to try and make the part-time work.

    While I’m doing that, it’s going to be work at the Photography and find as many options for bringing in some money with it over the next twelve Months. I do believe there’ll be time to get a full-time role down the track if it becomes absolutely necessary to stay afloat.

    As an aside, I managed to procure those texts I was discussing in a recent post, and I managed to get 50% off the total price, so managed to get them for under AU$110 in the end from the same publisher that was already the cheapest. Interestingly I’ve noticed Australian prices for books, boardgames and photography gear going up, despite the fact that they were blaming GST exclusions and the high Aussie Dollar. Western Society in general is just such a greedy beast.

    Out of the Inferno, Through Purgatory and on to Paradise…


    2015 - 08.14

    I’m finally starting to feel different and no longer still feeling echoes of my stint at my previous place of work. I actually feel detached from it now. It’s been a month since I resigned, and my sleeping has changed dramatically, my mood has been constantly elevated, and I’ve at no point felt a drifting towards another depressive patch. My health overall is improving. I’ve lost weight (not more than about 3 kg) but feeling that another kilo or two may not be unrealistic, and I’ve not had to try hard for that to happen. I’m reducing my sugar intake steadily although I’m not completely avoiding it yet. I’m certainly eating more healthy options than I was four months ago on a consistent basis. Not that my eating was unhealthy by any huge measure. But I’m changing some of what I eat and changing how I eat it. So far it’s all been for the better. I don’t see the Anti-Depressants going away soon but I’m certainly feeling more benefits from them than I was over the last six months.

    To sum up the work and health side of things up at the moment, less money but better quality of life. I know that without work for a period of time longer than a few months that will be difficult to maintain however that’s not the intention. The goal was always to be getting out of what was holding me back. Nothing more.

    The Furbags are very happy to have me home constantly at the present, although I’ve applied for two jobs so far in the last two weeks. Both jobs have been ones that I really couldn’t justify NOT applying for given that they were both in Ballarat. I hadn’t wanted to go looking for work for another month or so, but I figured either of these jobs couldn’t be up & running within 4 weeks anyway. I’m certainly not going to ignore good opportunities, just because they come up quick. I think the Furbags will have me home for a while yet. They’re getting plenty of “pat overdose” at the moment. They’re also keeping me happy and amused. I’ve been rigging up some cardboard boxes for them to play with during the week and it’s been hilarious watching them try to sneak into one after the other one has wandered off for a snack.

    It’s been nearly a week, and the new DNS servers are performing well. I’ve fixed a couple of configuration issues that I’d forgotten to check on the other servers with Static configurations and the network is the snappiest it’s ever been. I’ve also handed the servers a bit and cleaned up the firewall rules now that a few old activities are no longer happening. All in all very please. I’ve purchased another NAS as I’ve been very happy with the current one and need to provided some better Disaster Recovery options for the photography business side of things.

    I’ve scraped enough extra cash up to invest in a carbon fibre legged tripod for the trekking for the outdoor shooting. My gear has been getting heavier to carry over the last year on the treks out. I opted for another Manfrotto Tripod. It’s a tricky balance between sturdiness and stability; compactness & weight being the counterbalance. I opted for the X Pro 3 way head as against the alternative 496RC2. I’ve tried a couple of friend’s “Ball Heads”, and confess to not finding them my preferred mode. It is probably me, but I find it easier to deal along each axis individually, than wrestle with the weight of the camera & Lens while trying to position a “Ball Head”. I’ve yet to take it on a trek out, only having received it today, but since shoots have been scarce for a month and a half, I sense a few shoots coming up over the next week or two: life outside of Photography has been rather busy and full of change.

    Weighing Up Anchor…


    2015 - 07.18

    Well I’ve taken the plunge, but it seems necessary to move on and continue to press forward with recovery from my Depression. Last Tuesday I resigned from my present job with nothing to go to immediately. Reckless as it sounds, I honestly believe that my previous role had disintegrated to a daily struggle and the organisation I did it within was toxic to the core. Since all other areas of my life seemed to be moving forward with regard to the Depression, work was beginning to feel more & more like a boat anchor that had not yet hit the sea bed!

    So, I’ve set myself the goal of six to eight weeks chilling out and making sure that I’m definitely moving forward in my recovery, and that there’s nothing else holding me back. After that point, all things being as I have predicted, at the two month mark I should be healthy enough again to seriously start job seeking again. I know it’s a tough market out there at the moment, but staying where I was clearly did more harm than good, and the money wasn’t worth it. I had a fair bit of cream in that salary, so I can afford a drop if necessary to secure a future role. And, that said, I may not even work in I.T. anymore anyway. This last position has sort of tainted my perceptions of corporate I.T. and where it’s going. I may very well pick a job in another area when I’m ready.

    Photography and building my business is definitely the overall goal, but I have decided that I’ll put the last twelve months down as research and preparation, and the gathering of resources. My five year plan starts from now with regard to Shards of Arcadia.

    I’m going to be working hard on my stock art collection over the next few weeks to get a larger collection of that on sale. However I won’t be working so hard that I won’t be relaxing, and rebuilding my reserves, nor will I be ignoring my recovery.

    The Grindstone…


    2015 - 06.27

    Still a bit of a rolling ride lately. I’ve had the AD’s upped again, in the hope of getting back to work regularly. It’s still been a problem for me over several months. Hopefully the increase in dose will allow me to get back on the horse and stay on it this time around. I know it doesn’t have to be forever, but at the moment I need to get it back to the norm. After all, I still need money just for now. No more toys until I can get the dollars back up, the gap under the mattress is looking pretty empty.

    Stack It On…


    2015 - 05.03

    Normally a post on photography would be going on Shards of Arcadia but in this instance I’ll put it here for the moment as it’s more a summary, and I think I will be adding a “Techniques” page to Shards of Arcadia when I want to expand on it.

    I suppose the important point for me today about this is that I was reading some photography sites, and stumbled across a technique for enhancing the Depth of Field (DoF) for Macro & Landscape shots. Now this technique’s probably no surprise to the more experienced Macro shooter than myself, but I was blown away by what it will offer me. I’ve struggled with how to achieve “maximum” DoF with my Macro shots, and have often been wondering how others achieve considerably better results. Was it the gear? Well no, they were using gear of a similar calibre. Was it far more light? Once again not particularly. I’ve bought a flash ring and although it helped to some degree, it brought with it some other problems even though it resolved the difficulty of lack of light and using small aperture. It seems that there’s a technique / process that’s called by a number of names, but I found it first as “Focus Stacking”.

    Without going into a too technical diatribe that most of you will be completely bored with, I’ll simply outline the process. Some of you may be familiar with High Dynamic Range (HDR) Photography. It produces a striking image by the crafting together of multiple shots of the same scene or subject at different exposures, to create a composite image with a greater dynamic range overall than any single original shot. It creates some very powerful and wonderful shots. “Focus Stacking” is conceptually similar in that you take a number of shots of the same scene but shift the focus point ever so slightly for each individual shot. Once again software is used to “composite” all these shots into one image that reflects the multiple focus points thus representing a greater DoF.

    So what you say? Well for those of us who enjoy Macro photography which is probably most notable for it’s “detail”, it’s a boon! You’re able to present the viewer with an image which has more of the subject in focus and more of that interesting detail to be seen. Of course outside of the software to combine the images, not much is really needed to make this happen. However to do it extremely well, I see a number of additional pieces of hardware coming down the track. More on that later.

    I’m excited!

    Cardboard Everywhere…


    2015 - 03.30

    I’ve been on a board games spree this last month, catching up on all the titles I’d been putting off last year. But now that I’ve cleared those credit cards, I’ve been catching up. Latest to join the cupboard of “board gaming goodness” are the following titles listed below.

    Descent: Journeys in the Dark Version 2 and all the expansions for it.
    Descent: Journeys in the Dark Version 2 conversion kit for Version 1.
    Android.
    Merchant of Venus.
    Battle of Five Armies.
    Eldritch Horror and Mountains of Madness Expansion.

    Last weekend the Photography took a second place to the gaming. Speaking of Gaming, I have finally got to play what will most likely be the last computer game I buy: Pillars of Destiny. I’ve been looking forward to this games for months. The wait is over and it’s every bit as good as I’d hoped. For fans of the BG I & II, Icewind Dale and Torment games, look no further for you reprise of a dose of good old fashioned RPG.

    And as an aside there’s a nice new Macbook Pro on it’s way too. The PC is being donated to a friend who no doubt will relish every windows moment! The PC hasn’t been used since over a year ago when I bought the 27″ iMac.