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  • Archive for June, 2009

    A cold windy night…

    2009 - 06.29

    Yes it’s been a while, but life is rolling on, albeit slowly. I’ve been suffering a several bouts of depression over the last few months, more so than normal: I guess health issues are pecking away at me: the vultures are beginning to flock. The last six months of varying health issues, have no doubt exacerbated my irregular but consistent periods of depression.

    I’ve lived with Depression since my teens, possibly younger, although professionals differ on whether children experience clinical depression. Either way, there’s no doubt I’ve had to live with it prior to, then through active addiction and also through recovery. I won’t say that it’s been much easier to deal with it the last 19 years, but at least I’m experiencing it’s full intensity and surviving without “anesthetizing” it. Still that doesn’t mean it’s fun, nor does it mean it’s unsurmountable. It’s just, well “depressing”! 🙂

    Hopefully I’m moving out of this period now, and things can look up. Normally it’s about August / September that I experience it at it’s worst, but somehow I’m hoping it’s struck early this year, and I’ll be in for the rest of the year looking upwards psychologically and emotionally.

    It’s been eight months since my last relationship ended, and I’m starting to loosen up the armor again. I generally have a rule of not less than 12 months in between “liasons” outside of extenuating circumstances. Specifically there’s no manifest reason to do so yet. I don’t intend engaging in anything other than shallow and unadulterated sex for several months yet.

    Escape from New York…

    2009 - 06.07

    Forty Five minutes of Cloverfield

    All I could manged before hitting the stop button. I’m speechless and not in a good way. It’s 3/4 of an hour I’ll just have to write off.

    Diminishing returns…

    2009 - 06.07

    I’m Fifteen minutes into Cloverfield and already I’m having a disturbing rerun of that colossal waste of time called Blair Witch Project

    In Tandem with the Cosmos…

    2009 - 06.03

    Unrelated to the previous post, but of note. I seem to be enjoying a month of spiritual tranquility and comfort that I’ve not often felt in recent years. There seems no obvious reason, so I suspect the Cosmos has a surprise in store for me soon…

    Work, Play, Work, Play…

    2009 - 06.03

    Last few weeks have been flat out at work, and it seems that all I’ve had the interest in (outside of the usual sex, sex, and more sex), is watching video and playing games. However, that said, there’s been at least one “achievement”: I finished F.E.A.R. 2 on the xbox 360! Just 2 more games to finish and I can buy another one.

    On another front, I discovered a fascinating show: Fringe. Probably a bit behind the times with this one, compared to some others, but it’s definitely got me hooked, in much the same way that Dexter entrapped me. It’s a pleasant surprise to see John Noble in a role again. I’m not sure why I don’t come across him in roles, other than Denethor (LoTR). He’s really very talented and a joy to watch. He literally radiates the emotive and psychological essence of a role. He absolutely cracked me up with the following couple of lines:

    Walter: “This man’s been shot in the head!”
    Peter: “Is that a problem?”
    Walter: “Of course it’s a problem!”

    I’ve also been trying (and I DO mean trying) to watch Dollhouse by Jos Whedon. Normally I’m a big fan of Jos, but I’m struggling with this one. I cursed the executives that instigated the demise of Firefly. But I’m not sure I’d be so indignant about this one. I’ve watched 3 episodes so far, and I confess to wishing each episode to end upon reaching halfway through. The more I see her in action, and I like to watch her in action as she’s quite attractive, the more I am convinced that Eliza Dushku is less than acceptably talented as an actor. She just plays (I suspect anyway) Eliza Dushku! Every character I see her play is Faith all over again. So, short of the “eye candy” factor, the interest has got tired quickly, and the overall story is unlikely to have time to grab me: if I get to episode 6, I’ll be surprised. The concept has merit, but it’s lacking the character interaction and “chemistry” of his other creations. Perhaps he needs to move on from his stable of actors for lead roles and seek a new range of ingredients and create a new meal. This one lacks flavour.