I wonder how many “defining” moments a person experiences in his or her life and actually recognises them at the time rather than through hindsight?
I know I’ve had four that I can honestly say that at the moment each occurred it was fundamentally clear that something spiritually profound had happened in my life even though I could necessarily recognise the details.
The First was in my early Teens when I realised that I had developed a taste for Mood altering drugs that had become an insatiable hunger that I could never assuage no matter how much, or whatever I took. I could see it stripping everything from my being attempting to rot my very core. I was powerless to move at the time and could only tread water.
The Second was not all that long after when I was taken to a Coven and realised I had been confronted and touched by Evil (yes with a captial “E”). I have never fled from anything with such fear for my very being on a level much deeper than the physical. It took me months to feel “safe” anywhere. I don’t generally talk about that night, but I shudder whenever I recall it.
The Third was when I was 3 days clean, just gone into detox and found myself in an Narcotics Anonymous meeting in Footscray on a Thursday night. I was stunned by the realisation that I now had an out from the previously hopeless and seemingly inescapable pit of self destruction and despair. I’d had no true experience of the positively spiritual until that moment in my life.
The Fourth is also a much more positive one. During the last I was struck immediately by the power of the presence of a single person, and became immediately aware that they would have more than a moment in my life. I don’t know that the reverse was true, but I guess that such epiphanies are from within, and nothing external offers others such insight into our own personal interaction with the Cosmos. But here was a person I could not help but want in my life in some shape or form. Revelation after revelation proceeded, faster than I could believe. And now here I am stunned at what I could not foresee despite the impact at the time.
Cosmic wonders abound both within and without and life IS worth living.